Tag Archives: forgiveness

Can We Forgive Enough to Ban the Box?

By Monica Nelson Twenty years ago I worked as a volunteer with a group that taught GED preparation to a group of prisoners at a large metropolitan county jail. What a wonderful experience that was. Our little group consisted of three or four instructors and a leader who was in charge of our program. We met with a group of around 20 prisoners once a week. The men we instructed had to be chosen to participate in the program because there was a waiting list three times longer than the number of accepted participants. Each student had to display exemplary behavior to get in and, once in, had to give … Continue reading

Posted in Insights from My Life | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Top 10 Qualities to Grow If You Want Indestructible Friendships

By Monica Nelson True friends are priceless. We all want and need friendships. Emerging science suggests that our brains and nervous system thrive from interactions created through friendship. And that our self-identity is derived from people we closely associate with. But we don’t need science to know that friends add zest and well-being to our lives. So here are my top ten qualities you will want to grow if you hope to create lasting and unbreakable friendships. 1. Love. You probably love your friend or that person would not be your friend. Having that love and showing it on a daily basis are two separate qualities. Love grows on its … Continue reading

Posted in Character Building | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How to Handle Conflicting Information – 5 Steps to Peaceful Progress

By Monica Nelson To those of us who seek out counsel and advice from valued sources, looking for the answers to our personal life questions, it can be a bit confusing sometimes. Conflicting advice abounds in our information-laden world. One example might be the question of whether or not it is appropriate to gain wealth. On the one hand you find information that suggests that there is nothing wrong with making money. Often such advice uses as support the fact that once you have a certain amount of wealth, you will be able to share it with those who are less fortunate. On the other hand, you will find advice that … Continue reading

Posted in Discerning Your World | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

If you find it hard to forgive, take a radical approach

By Monica Nelson For me, forgiveness is a high aspiration, as you can probably tell if you have read my blog for any length of time. But putting it into practice (and making it stick) is one of the most difficult of my pursuits. If you are with me in this same exasperating goal, you will want to listen to what Colin Tipping has to say in his book, Radical Forgiveness. Discovering this book has (and I don’t say this lightly) changed my life. I hope sharing this with you will work miracles for you too. I will attempt as comprehensive a summary as I can below. In addition, I … Continue reading

Posted in Discerning Your World, Insights from My Life | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Seven Forgiveness Rules Memorialized in Insightful Quotes

By Monica Nelson You can learn a great deal from leaders and thinkers who make their mark on society sharing their insights. Below are seven rules to remember in making forgiveness a priority in your life. Each is accompanied by a renowned quote to help solidify its relevance. Rule 1: Forgiving another is one of the hardest actions you can perform. Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were. –Cherie Carter-Scott The reason forgiveness is such a difficult act is because it forces us beyond our boundaries. It makes us look beyond ourselves and empathize, gain compassion and humility, and in so doing, strengthen … Continue reading

Posted in Discerning Your World | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

If your happiness depended upon it, could you accept yourself without reservation?

By Monica Nelson A recent study showed something quite amazing. A survey of 5,000 people rated responses to ten scientifically-identified happiness “keys” or habits. The keys are these: Giving Relating Exercising Appreciating Trying out Direction Resilience Emotion Acceptance Meaning Respondents were asked to rate how often they practiced these habits. Which one do you think came in last? Okay, I gave it away already. Acceptance (self-acceptance) was the one least practiced. It scored a lowly 5.56 out of 10. Giving came in first with 7.41. I find that troubling, because you cannot truly give from the heart if you come from a position of self-debasement. So why do so many of … Continue reading

Posted in Discerning Your World | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Don’t Wait for a Deathbed Realization – Live the Full Life Now

By Monica Nelson A couple years ago I received the call I had feared for years. My mother told me that my father was dying. He had been moved to a hospice the night before, but the doctors believed he would not stay long. His death was imminent. Could I come? As I packed up, ready to make the 500-mile trip to my childhood home, I contemplated what my father might be going through. What kind of end-of-life contemplation hovered in his consciousness? It was no coincidence that I was reading The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself, at that time. The book was spurring me on to evaluate my … Continue reading

Posted in Insights from My Life | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Finding the Way to Forgiveness

By Monica Nelson Several months ago I went through one of those life defining experiences that grab you by the nape of the neck and shake every part of you. The incident not only took me by surprise, but was one in which I felt I was unjustly accused. One of a handful of incidents from a long life that will always be marked painful. It left me feeling alone and isolated. Though the incident involved my entire family, it felt very personal. Like every friend in my town (other than my immediate family) had united against me. Only a few people were directly involved in the violation, the rest … Continue reading

Posted in Insights from My Life | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

The Two Paths of Rejected Love

By Monica Nelson I have a friend who tells the story of her parents. They were both very young and neither had experienced romantic love before. Having met on a blind date, they instantly and instinctively knew that they had met their soul mate. They married within two weeks of meeting because he was to go off to war. They remained married and happily in love until the day they died many years later. Fascinating, beautiful story. But one that is rare. The majority of us experience at least one rejection and that rejection generally cuts down to the bone. My own story is more common. I was into my … Continue reading

Posted in Character Building, Insights from My Life | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Love, Truth, and an Absolute Need for Clear Perspective

By Monica Nelson I am always working on finding the truth. The truth to me is what is good and right. And it is not always what is obvious. Why is it so important to me to do this? People who know me well, think of me as a rather straight-laced, somewhat naive person. I tend to look for the positive in people, which has a tendency to bite me in my vulnerabilities more often than is comfortable. At the heart of my soul, I believe that people are basically good but often misguided individuals whose evil-leaning tendencies originate from a lack in their lives. Some lack more than others. … Continue reading

Posted in Character Building, Discerning Your World | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment